No Good For No One Now

Where did everyone go?

Honestly sometimes I wonder where everyone disappeared to. Truth be told, almost all my friends have gotten married started to have their families and moved elsewhere. Which makes being 29 kind of weird for me, because I have never moved past being twenty or so.

No I'm not immature or anything, but that life hasn't found me yet. I'd love to have it, but what can I say it's tough being in love with a girl that won't give you that.

Fact of the matter is I'm looking for that love that works both way, then I will happily surrender my inability to settle down and join everyone else.

It's hard for me because I'm afraid...

YES! AFRAID! Of women and everything associated with being in a relationship with them. So when I do find someone I am comfortable with and can almost, I did say almost express my feelings to them it doesn't work out.

It's harder too knowing exactly where my faults are and trying to fix them, and failing at that too.

You couldn't possibly give me an “F” because I would fail at that too. So I figure I should interview someone who would give us some insight into my shortcomings... myself.

1. How many girlfriends have you had?

Officially? Well one, if you don't want to count the one I had in grade school. My first real and only girlfriend came when I was twenty five.

2. Pretty sad, did you not date in High School? Between you and her, who made the first move?

No I didn't date in high school, but I did have a major crush on a girl for the last year and it did linger on, because she became the girl that I never could come clean to, and admit my feelings.

As for my ex-girlfriend, I put my hands down her pants... unsuccessfully, her belt was done up and I couldn't slip it in. She kissed me, so in essence I failed, and she had to right the ship.

3. Why didn't it last?

Beats me, it was the long distance I guess. The first and only girlfriend I had and she lived three hours away. So basically when you can't see someone you just disappear from their mind I guess, and the worst thing is she officially broke up with me on/the day after my birthday.

4. Would you say that's a reason why you fail at dealing with women?

No, it was well before her. Hell I doubted I was ever going to have a girlfriend. It did have an impact on me, but I've always felt I'm not good enough for anyone and really would never make a good boy friend. I have too many short comings and no confidence. So why bother approaching women?

I've got nothing to offer.

Well that's great, you're sinking this interviewer faster than I could have. Thanks for coming out today.

Wow. I am pathetic.